Brain Paint ACar

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Answers: Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American. Machiavelli: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The ends of crossing the road justify whatever motive there was. Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out. Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and, therefore, synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being. John Locke: Because he was exercising his natural right to liberty. Albert Camus: It doesn't matter; the chicken's actions have no meaning except to him. The Bible: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing. Fox Mulder: It was a government conspiracy. Freud: The fact that you thought that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads Darwin #2: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees. Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. Oliver Stone: The question is not "Why did the chicken cross the road?" but is rather "Who was crossing the road at the same time whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?" Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?" The Pope: That is only for God to know. Martin Luther King, Jr.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question. Immanuel Kant: The chicken, being an autonomous being, chose to cross the road of his own free will. Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us. Dirk Gently (Holistic Detective): I'm not exactly sure why, but right now I've got a horse in my bathroom. Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken 2000, which will both cross roads AND balance your checkbook, though when it divides 3 by 2 it gets 1.49999999. M.C.Escher: That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time. George Orwell: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests. Colonel Sanders: I missed one? Plato: For the greater good. Aristotle: To actualize its potential. Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability. Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road,the Road gazes also across you. B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences, which had pervaded its sensorium from birth, had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will. Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road. Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference. Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road? The Sphinx: You tell me. Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature. Emily Dickenson: Because it could not stop for death. Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it. Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain. Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. Saddam Hussein #2: It is the Mother of all Chickens. Joseph Stalin: I don't care. Catch it. I need its eggs to make my omelette. Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it, I've not been told! O.J.: It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.

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Your Amazing Brain Adventure is a web site all about Tickling Your Amygdala- i.e. turning on the best part of your brain as easy as clicking on a light switch. This is done as easily as imagining a feather inside of your head stimulating a compass, the amygdala. The amygdala is a set of twin organs, a part of your brain that sits right in between the most advance part of your brain- the frontal lobes and pre-frontal cortex- and the most primitive part of your brain- your "reptile brain" and brain stem.  By tickling your amygdala you instantly and directly increase creativity, intelligence, pleasure, and also make possible a spontaneous natural processes known as "paranormal abilities", although such things as telepathy and ESP are really as natural as breathing, or as easy doing simple math in your head. The ability to self stimulate the amygdala by something as simple as thought has been proven in laboratory experiments, such as those conducted at Harvard University research labs, 1999-2009, and can be tracked with modern brain scanning machines such as fMRI and PET... Indeed, thought is faster than light.

 

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InkJetHelper.com  is a web site about escaping from the ridiculous cost of ink jet printer ink refilling- and refilling your printer for pennies instead of $70 a shot. It also has useful tips about maintaining ink jet printers, especially Canon brand printers.

 

Julia Lu Painting is all about the creative works of Chinese painter Julia Lu, a modern master of oil and water color painting. Julia shares her creative secrets, ideas, as well as her art work.

 

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